Over the years I've come to realize that I really missed out on saying exactly what was on my mind - sometimes intentionally biting my tongue. I decided to put together a list of "things I should have said" some of them are quite amusing - at least to me. I hope you enjoy them as well and should the opportunity present itself, please use them! Feel free to add to this list!
1) You mean that is it? Seriously? Hmmm, didn't know that they came in munchkin size, I guess that explains the talented tongue, eh?
2) You can act like Mike Tyson all you want. I'm going to be Evander Holyfield. You know the guy who beat Mike Tyson?
3) You asked for no contact, no contact by definition means I won't contact you, go to your websites, cross paths etc and YOU do the same. It doesn't mean, I avoid you but you check up on me at all opportunities.
4) Wow, is that all you can do? I mean, what do you do when you are not hard? Seriously, do you have hobbies?
5) When one lives in a glass house, they really should learn to close the drapes sweetie.
6) You know I only put up with you because I enjoyed spending time with your friends.
7) If I give him to you, you get the whole shebang, down to the dirty diapers and nasty smelling dog. Have fun with that sweetie.
8) Talking behind one's back doesn't make you all the more special. It does nothing but show how shallow of a friend you are and how uncouth a person you are. Grow up.
9) Oh the tangled webs you weave when first you practice to deceive...you might want to check your notes on that sweetheart - because your lies are crossing and not making sense. Shall I wait for you to get your story straight?
10) Honestly, I did not think penis' came in that small of a size. Can you get a penal implant or something?
11) No matter who he is with, I will always have a place in his life - either via child support, children needing something or just being that damn good in bed. He will always grade the woman he is with sexually against how damn good I am -
12) I have the golden pussy - trust me, I know. He told me so!
13) You think I don't know what you have been up to? Oh sweetie, I could write a biography on you - without any input from you.
14) Everything you want - I had it first. Remember that chickie.
15) You are not nor will you ever be anything that I want in my life. You are a cancer, there to remind those of us how wonderful our lives really are.
*more to follow!